WEDNESDAY'S SCRIPT TIP:

40 DAYS OF SYMBOLIC DIALOGUE

Film is a visual medium, so dialogue is usually used as a counterpoint to the action. People usually do one thing and say something entirely different. If a character is afraid, they usually claim that they aren't scared, using false bravado to hide their terror. If the visual portion of the film is giving the exact same information as the verbal portion, you have redundancy... the dialogue seems obvious because we can SEE that the character is afraid, so why do they need to say it? If you SHOW that he loves her, he needs to SAY something else... but what? What do you do when the dialogue needs to carry the information, but you don't want it to sound stale and obvious?

That's where "symbolic dialogue" comes in. Find a detail that symbolizes their love and talk about that instead. Instead of talking about Subject A, which would create obvious dialogue, have your character talk about Subject B.

Robert Perez's comedy 40 DAYS AND 40 NIGHTS opens with a video that chronicles his relationship with his long time girlfriend Nicole (Vinessa Shaw)... ending with the break up of their relationship. Matt (Josh Hartnet) has been watching the video on his laptop and when it's over a box pops up: "Delete Nicole?" Matt has the cursor on "delete", looks at the image of Nicole - can he really delete her from his life? - then moves the cursor to "save" and clicks twice. He's still hung up on her. No matter how many one night stands he has, he can't get her out of his head. His roommate Ryan (Paulo Costanzo) has arraigned a double date with a pair of hot girls from Lake Tahoe, but that night when things are getting hot & heavy, Matt just can't bring himself to sleep with her. Both have stripped down to their underwear and she's all over him... but he excuses himself to the bathroom, where his roommate finds him...

                    RYAN
     Throw me a Magnum for my magnum, big boy?

                    MATT
     Yeah.
          (throws him a condom)
     Hey, have you ever noticed a crack on my ceiling?

                    RYAN
     Dude, you're action packed with issues.

                    MATT
     I can't do this anymore. I can't --

                    RYAN
     What? Does Johnny not want to come out 
     and play?

                    MATT
     No. No! Johnny's fine, okay? It's... 
     I'm all fucked up.

                    RYAN
     Alright, alright, alright. Here's what 
     you're gonna do. You're gonna strap a helmet 
     on big John, put him in the game, and he play 
     his heart out, okay? He will put up big numbers 
     for you. You will forget about the cracks in 
     the ceiling, forget about Nicole, just go out 
     and give your star player the support he needs. 
     Right? 
          (hands him a condon)
     Helmet.

See how Perez avoided cliche dialogue by using a sports analogy? By talking about subject B instead of subject A, he could use dialogue to carry the information without resorting to the obvious. He talk about how hot the girl is, managed to talk about sex without being X-rated, and barely mentioned the real issue - Nicole. The football analogy makes the dialogue clever, and it's completely in character. The Dot-Com where they work has betting pools on football games, baseball games, and will end up having a pool on whether Hartnet can go 40 days and 40 nights without sex. The analogy fits the characters and the story - it's organic.

Using "symbolic dialogue" keeps your character's words from giving identical information as their actions and adds a new level to the dialogue. Plus, symbolic dialogue can be amusing... a good thing whether you're writing a comedy or not.

DRAMATIC SYMBOLISM

One of the problems with Skip Wood's SWORDFISH is corny dialogue between Hugh Jackman and his daughter. This is the most critical relationship in the entire film - it's Jackman's motivation to commit an escalating series of crimes - so we have to believe in it. If the relationship feels false, the whole movie crumbles. The problem is, in scene after scene he's hugging her and telling her that he loves her. That wouldn't seem like a problem in the real world, but in the REEL world it becomes overkill. We have redundant information. Hugging his daughter SHOWS that he loves her, so TELLING her that he loves her makes it seem as if the writer is using a sledgehammer to make his point.

I haven't read the original script, so it's possible this problem was created by bad development instead of the screenwriter... but that's even worse! Development is supposed to make scripts BETTER, not destroy their credibility.

If you SHOW that he loves her, he needs to SAY something else... but what?

That's where "symbolic dialogue" comes in. Find a detail that symbolizes their love and talk about that instead.

Jackman tells his daughter he wants her to live with him, and it comes off On The Nose and redundant. Why not have her ask if he has room for her dolls? A conversation about his daughter's dolls might be playful and fun... yet really be about how much he loves her and how he would do anything to have her live with him.

In BREAKING AWAY Paul Dooley's character talks to his son about having pride in who you are. Because that would come off preachy if addressed directly, screenwriter Steve Tesich found the detail and created this Oscar winning speech:

 EXT. CAMPUS - NIGHT

 The campus is deserted. Dave and Mr. Blase are walking
 slowly outside a huge classroom building. Mr. Blase lights
 a cigarette.        

                        MR. STOLLER
          Just one.. Don't tell mother.
               (looking at the building)
          You know, I do.this every now
          and then. Come here at night
          and...I cut the stone for that
          building over there-...

                         DAVE
          Yes, I know, Dad.

                       MR. STOLLER
          I was one fine stonecutter...
          Mike's dad...Moocher's, Cyril's
          ...we all were. Well, Cyril's
          dad...Ah, never mind. The thing
          is. I loved it. I was young,
          slim and strong and damn proud
          of my work...and the buildings
          went up...and when they were
          finished...damnest thing happened.
          It was like the buildings were 
          too good for us. Nobody told us
          that. But we just felt uncomfortable.
          Even now. I'd like to be able
          to stroll through the campus and
          look at the limestone but I feel
          out of place. I suppose you
          guys still go swimming in the
          quarries.


                         DAVE
          Sure.

                      MR. STOLLER
          So, all you get from my twenty
          years of work is the holes we
          left behind.

This is a great scene from Steve Tesich's BREAKING AWAY where Paul Dooley tells his son about cutting the stones used to build the local college... but it's more than that. I implore you to rent the movie. It's a great film that few people remember today... with an Oscar Winning screenplay.

Instead of talking about Subject A, which would create obvious dialogue, have your character talk about Subject B.

This can also work in creating unique "code phrases" for your script. In an early scene in Mike Rich's FINDING FORESTER, hoopkid Jamal Wallace asks Sean Connery's William Forrester a question about soup preparation... then follows up with a personal question. Connery doesn't say "That question is too personal, I don't want to answer it because we don't know each other well enough for me to divulge that information", he says, "That's not exactly a soup question." From that point on the phrase "soup question" becomes symbolic of prying personal questions that neither man feels comfortable answering. It's a "code phrase" used in conversation several more times in the movie. Not only does this make the dialogue interesting and unique, it makes the audience feel like an insider - we know the code!

Using "symbolic dialogue" keeps your character's words from giving identical information as their actions and adds a new level to the dialogue.

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